When It’s Time to Talk It Through

You’ve done plenty of research, you’ve started asking questions, and now it’s time to connect with your loved one about their living options. Maybe you’re wondering how you might talk to a loved one about getting help or are looking to open up the conversation with them about whether they should move to a senior living community. It’s not always an easy conversation to have, but going about it the right way can help them live more safely and get more out of life when choosing to move to a Pacifica Senior Living community.

Preparing for the CONVERSATION

We find that it’s best to spend some time researching ahead of time and coming prepared to the conversation with information. This will help ease some of the worries your loved one might have. Going into the conversation with confidence and compassion can help.

Questions to Ask Ahead of Time

There are a few questions to ask when determining if a senior living community might be the best choice for your loved one: Are they having health problems? Are they having trouble with daily activities, such as dressing, grooming, bathing, or managing medicines? These are questions you may want to include when having discussions with other family members as well.

Educate Yourself

As you learn more about senior care options, you’ll have a better understanding of what will be the right fit for an aging loved one. Don’t downplay how serious a senior’s need for help really is and be as objective as you can.

Learn About Living Options

Where you live influences how well you live. As aging happens, location and environment have an effect on everything – from physical safety and mental health to longevity. The more you learn about this, the better prepared you will be.

Exploring options and learning more about successful aging can give you the confidence needed to begin the conversation with your loved one and your family members. You are preparing yourself to be as helpful and supportive as possible in the conversation and decisions ahead.

How to Have a Better Senior CARE Conversation

Once you feel confident explaining options, these suggestions can help you have a productive, meaningful conversation with your loved one.

Talk in Person

Aim to have a face-to face conversation. Arrange a time when you are both rested and relaxed. Block out a time and a location where you can talk without interruption.

Listen

Don’t minimize the feelings of your loved one, and be fully present in the conversation. It’s important to acknowledge their feelings, thoughts, and emotions. Continue to ask questions to understand any reservations they might have. Make it clear that you respect their wishes and that you want to help them be as comfortable as they can be.

Show Empathy

Your calm voice and kind demeanor will show you care. You’re trying to understand any fears or frustrations they feel. The idea of moving to an Assisted Living community may be tough. You begin to help when you continue to listen.

Don’t Rush

Once you’ve researched information on behalf of your loved one, you may feel the decision should be made. But your loved one may need more time. Try to put yourself in their shoes. This is a major change to their lifestyle and it may take them some time to fully understand and express what they are feeling and wanting to do. Allow them time to process the information. A mutual agreement on how and when to continue the discussion will pay dividends in the long run. Visit a local Pacifica community and engage in our outings and events. It is a great way to get the to know us!

Plan to Talk Further

The reality is this will likely be a series of talks over time – unless, of course, your loved one is no longer in a safe situation and is in need of additional support or assistance.

Arrange a Community Visit

An in-person visit to one of our Pacifica Senior Living communities is one of the best ways to alleviate worries about a potential move. It’ll paint a clearer picture of what a community is actually like and will show your loved one just how warm, welcoming, and inviting their potential new residence is. They will get an idea of the lifestyle, amenities, culture, friendly team members, and caring neighbors.

It’s Their Decision

Unless there is incapacitation, they get to decide to stay or move. You have the opportunity to ask questions and raise concerns, but the decision is theirs.

CONVERSATION Starters

Beginning the discussion is often the hardest part. Open-ended questions are the best way to encourage them to share more information. These conversation pointers may help when talking with your loved one:

How is it living at home?
Do you feel safe?
Do you have concerns with medication, falling, bathroom, or kitchen struggles?
What about the fear of crime?
Do you have a plan for long-term care?
If you couldn’t take care of yourself, where would you go?
How do you feel about driving?
Is it hard to pay bills or manage finances?
Would there be less stress without your house?

Avoid INFORMATION Overload

Make an effort to not overload the conversation with research and statistics or by sharing too much information. This can be overwhelming. Take your time and make this a journey of discovery and growth over the course of a few conversations. Ease into important topics as time goes and help your loved one feel comfortable communicating and sharing along the way.